Over the weekend, the weather was insanely warm. Hot really, steamy. We were back in our pool, finally, after missing it all winter. I had my new camera out on the deck yesterday. I was taking some photos of the birds in the yard and just general stuff, like I do.
I got into the pool before my hunny did and was floating around on the raft thing we have when I noticed him taking the lens cover off the camera. Slightly horrified, I tried not to freak out when I realized he was taking photos of the backyard, the pool and me. A sudden, serious storm blew in and the photos were forgotten while we hustled about, covering the pool and putting stuff away. Last night, I took the photos off the camera and saw the few he took with me in them. It was shocking. I was shocked anyway. It was upsetting too. I mean, I know what I look like, I see myself in the mirror every day. Hell, we have mirrored closet doors in our bedroom so I see myself naked in the mirror every day too. Something about seeing a photograph is different though. I looked way bigger than I imagine that I am. Don't get me wrong, I know how big I am but those photos, laying down, on the water, in a swimsuit, pale and white from the winter, it was all a bit much.
Last night, I didn't sleep well. That was more about getting too much sun yesterday than the photos. In between not sleeping, I had some weird dreams and one of them was about my weight. I guess the photos got to me more than I realized. Hopefully, this is a good slap in the face for me and I'll be able to pull up my socks and get my shit together.
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2 comments:
Boy, I agree...photos do not lie. But they can also be taken at "weird" angles, making you look bigger than you are. No worries!
I don't like pictures either! My daughter is a big girl and yet she gets some awesome pictures...how does she do it? I have not seen one good one of me!
The winter was not kind to me either! Very very pale and I don't care what they say, fat looks better tanned!
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