Monday, April 07, 2003

Holy smokes, Monday again. Here is this week's Progress Prompt:

Have you ever experienced discrimination for being the size you are? Describe what happened.

I have had some very odd things happen to me because of my size. I think that some people have preconceived notions about people, based on their appearances. Whenever something is "preconceived" it's never good, whether it is a positive or negative thing.

The weirdest thing was not the kind of discrimination that you may expect. I was once hired by a woman, I think, because of my size. She herself was overweight, another woman in the office was larger than her. I was larger than both of them. The boss, Nicole, had some major body and control issues. To say that she was an odd duck with major hormonal imbalances would be an understatement. The other woman in the office, Debby, was quite meek and quiet. She was shy and very self conscious about her size. I, on the other hand, was not. I have never had a problem with self esteem. I never got caught up in body image or hung up about my appearance. Perhaps that is why I was able to get this big, I just didn't care (I still don't care what people think about me or what I look like -- I'm doing this for myself - to get healthy).

Anyway, I think that Nicole thought that I was like Debby and that she'd be able to use me and abuse me in the same way that did to Debby. Debby wouldn't say "shit" to Nicole if her mouth was full of it. I, on the other hand, asked questions and challenged things - not to the point of being insubordinate mind you. Nicole didn't like that I wasn't a loveable, fat, doormat and eventually I was fired. It was the only time in my life that I have been fired and I was so angry about it until I realized why she had done it. She and her husband owned the business and I could tell that he didn't want to fire me (I was very good at what I was doing) but he had no choice.

It ended up being a good thing for me because I ended up in a much better job a couple of months later. I see her from time to time, on the street, and she can't look me in the eye. I always make a point to stare in her direction and smile, head held high. She's a coward and a bully and I know that she deliberately hires fat women with low self esteem so that she can feel thin and strong. How weak is that?

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