Tuesday, April 08, 2003

I don't often have food cravings anymore, neither does my SO. I was surprised last night, after we finished up at my father-in-law's place and we were heading for home, when he mentioned that he could eat a Blizzard. I looked at him and asked if he needed one, because if he felt that he did, we could go to DQ and do the drive thru and he could get one (I feel that you should feed a craving, briefly and nip it in the bud before it drives you over the edge and into a dangerous place). I know that if I had said, "yeah, Blizzards!" he'd have done it, gone and ate one and then regretted it afterwards. He didn't really want the Blizzard per se as much as he wanted something to snack on. He wasn't even hungry. I used to do this, we used to do this together. Eat out of boredom, eat as an activity, just eat. Anything in sight, whenever we wanted, whether we were hungry or not. We would justify by saying that we deserved it, a reward for a job well done or for coping with a stressful situation, we could justify anything, anytime. By the time we got home and he got a cold drink, the "wanting something" had passed.

Eating for recreation is dangerous and it's what got us into this in the first place. We were both larger people when we met but the last year or so, the recreational eating really caught up with us. I was at my mum's place on the weekend and saw some photos she had taken of us in 2000 and some from Christmas and we almost didn't look the same. Yikes. On the day we started this, we took some "before" photos. On Friday night, 3 months after we started, I took some progress photos (don't ask me to post them, I'm not ready to) and couldn't believe the difference I saw. He's lost 47 pounds, I've lost 39 and I think we've lost it all in our faces. That's not true entirely but that's where I really saw it. We both looked so unhappy in those before photos, really unhealthy. In the progress shots, we're smiling and standing up straighter and just look "better." Someday, I will post them. I'm just not ready to do it right now.

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